And yes I did go out last night and I smoked more than I had all week. I stayed up too late... (4:30am) and got up to late at like 8:05. I was determined however to take a shower and get the bar stench off me, grab myself my new box of Chantix and breakfast stuff and somehow make it to work by 8:30 and still stop for coffee (bout a 7 min drive plus 2 min in line for coffee). Well my determination hit a big fat road block. What the hell did I do with my KEYS... they don't seem to be in my purse GAH!!!
I searched the entire house for like 15 minutes and called work to let them know I would be late. After my frantic search throughout the house I dumped my purse and there they were.
SO.... I get in the car... Drive straight to work with no coffee... Walk in late for the all staff and students Community Meeting... sit down and realize... I made it through one of the most stressful, tired mornings I have had in a long time without a smoke.. I don't even think the idea of smoking occurred to me until I sat down at work. Then I admit I wanted one REALLY badly. But of course I don't have any and the craving did indeed pass...
Yay for Chantix I couldn't do it without you!!
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9 comments:
Yay Lakasha! That is awesome. The first day is such a very big deal, and I'm so glad you are making your way through it. 4:30AM? Sheesh.
I am making it but I will say right now.. this isn't fucking easy at all.
I drove around in my car for like 15 minutes of my lunch time because while I have gotten used to not smoking in it I knew that as soon as I got out I would want to smoke..
Sure enough I really wanted a cigarrete as soon as I got out of the car. But I resisted.. Yay me..
Keep going! I agree, not fun. It sucks. It should get easier before long if you can just make it through these parts. Remember to breathe! Pretending like I'm actually smoking but just breathing air has been known to work for me (I just don't do it in public because they'll lock me up).
Lakasha, relax, dear, it'll be better. Maybe not right away, but you'll so thank yourself for following through with your strong determination to quit!
You'll have good and bad moments, but you have no idea how much worse it would've been without Chantix! So what you're experience now is not a big deal, although I know it may feel like that at times.
You're a great fighter! Too late to turn back now. :) Remember that even if you smoked now it would not be the same as before. You'll get really, really sick, trust me, I know - remember my slip up? I got sooooooo freaking dizzy and felt nasty I was going to pass out.
I will not slip... everytime I am even tempted I will just keep that mantra going in my head.
It simply isn't worth it to me to ever pick up a cigarette again. You are right it is way to late to turn back now.
I was a damn good smoker... I smoked through all sorts of sickness's (most probably caused by the damn smokes). I was a dedicated smoker.
I am going to be an EVEN better non-smoker. I am now far more dedicated to not smoking.
And with the support of all you great people I know I can do this.
Good work Lakasha! Keep it up...since you are just a few days ahead of me on the Chantix, I will be checking back here for inspiration!
Hiya Nathan... Glad that I can offer you a bit of inspiration I know how much that helps. Keep me updated on how you are doing. You should consider joining us all in making your own blog :)
Congratulations on getting through your first day as a non smoker! I will be joining that club in less than a week, myself. I am actually excited!
Hooray! Hope the rest of your day was a success!
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